So, I'm working on a story for apocalypsebang. I need a country for the US to be eyeball-to-eyeball with USSR at the height of the Cold War style, but I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. Usually my go to in situations like this is, "LOL, pick on Cuba! It's not offensive if you're bombing your own motherland! :D" but for obvious historical reasons, Cuba is, like, so last season as far as cold wars go.
On twitter, I whined for my friends to do all my work for me and was rewarded with two great suggestions! unavoidedcrisis suggested Antarctica and wutendeskind suggested Switzerland. My slightly cracky explanations for how these countries become the new USSR will be:
Antarctica: "I'm all for nonproliferation, but why did we think sending all the world's nukes to Antarctica & then also exiling a bunch of failed dictators there was a good idea?" "I guess that's what happens when you force Republicans to throw away their weapons."
Switzerland: "Yeah, and to think, we could have prevented this whole thing so easily if we hadn't just believed them when they said they were neutral and left them to stock up on weapons without ever suspecting it."
or if you have another suggested explanation for either of the above or any other suggested country, fire away (har har, get it, because nuclear warheads?)
Which country is the next USSR?
I have a funnier but just as inoffensive option for you, Cherie. And I will explain why in a comment.
If this was the end of the world, would there still be bacon?
There will always be bacon.
There will be incest and bacon.
Bacon twinkies actually sound kind of delicious.
Here's a video we've all seen 100 times but would nonetheless like to see 100 more for your pains: