Here's my life in a nutshell: I got that second job. So far so good, but of course school's off and it's the holidays, so if I regret my decision, it'll be once I get busy. No spoilers but the Leverage ending was perfect in every way. MY REDSKINS ARE GOING TO THE PLAYOFFS AND I STILL FUCKING DON'T UNDERSTAAANNDD BUT JFC THIS IS AMAZING. The Hobbit was amazing, as was having ordinaryink come visit me so we could see it at midnight. Oh, also, I unexpectedly hated the Les Miserables movie. There, I came clean.
I've been staying busy and fannish lately. Here are some things I've written recently:
Title: The Crumbling Difference (Between Wrong and Right)
Rating: NC-17 for explicit sexual content, soulbonding, alcohol use, and language
Word Count: 16,518
Author’s Note: Written for wincestielbang.
Summary: AU after 5x22: Tired of seeing Dean trying to live without his brother, Castiel decides to do what he can to bring Sam back. Raising Sam creates a bond between the three of them that follows Castiel to Heaven, linking him to Sam and Dean whether he wants to feel them or not. The Winchester brothers decide to settle down and rebuild a haunted house, making sure that Castiel knows he has a home there if he wants it. But while Castiel wants nothing more than to fall again and join them, his duty keeps him in Heaven, fighting a civil war for a place he no longer feels at home in.
Title: Up in the Air
Fandom: Real Person Fic: CW
Rating: NC-17 for explicit sexual content, alcohol use, and language
Word Count: 10,011
Author’s Note: Written for lazy_daze for spn_j2_xmas.
Summary: AU: Genevieve is an aspiring actress working dead-end jobs to pay the bills until she gets her big break. Her life isn't exactly glamorous just yet; in fact, she spends most of her time waitressing at a chain restaurant inside LAX and pining over Adrianne, a flight attendant who occasionally passes through her terminal.
NOT a thing I wrote, but while I'm on the subject of spn_j2_xmas and Gen/Adrianne being excellent, TAKE A LOOK AT THE INCREDIBLE GIFT I GOT from scarletscarlet this year! Adrianne is a motherfucking wereshark, so basically it's too perfect for my feeble human mind to comprehend.
Furthermore, on the subject of Genevieve Padalecki being my wife, this is a thing I just learned exists:
EVERYONE SHOULD GO SIGN THE FUCK UP RIGHT NOW BEFORE I DIE BECAUSE OH MY GOD, GEN. PLEASE PLEASE WRITE ME GEN FIC AND DRAW ME PRETTY GEN ART THINGS AND PLEASE, OH GOD.
Now I will do that super self-indulgent meme I do every year about how much I wrote and blah. Don't worry. I use cut for better to spare you.
Here Be Dragons [Supernatural; Sam/Dean] 50states_spn - 1,877 (written this year; 4,657 total)
Starbucks Rewards [CW RPF; Jared/Jensen] insmallpackages - 1,530
Just Keep Swimming [CW RPF; Jared/Jensen] Timestamp to Under the Sea - 1,689
Always the Groomsman, Never the Groom [CW RPF; Jared/Jensen/Genevieve] polybigbang - 25,677
Rub Me the Right Way [CW RPF; Jared/Jensen] j2_everafter - 20,295
Here's Looking at You [Supernatural; Sam/Dean] super_disney - 8,880
Now Sleeps the Swan [Supernatural; Sam/Dean] spn_cinema - 8,797
There and Back Again (B.A. honors thesis on 20th Century fantasy literature) – 17,352
Formed of Dust [Supernatural X His Dark Materials; Sam/Dean] sncross_bigbang - 16,523
Rattling Your Locks [CW RPF; Jared/Jensen] spn_j2_bigbang - 50,240
It's a Potluck [Supernatural; Sam/Dean] Timestamp to Houses Out of Cardboard Boxes for my Timestamp Meme - 1,783
4 Supernatural timestamps for my Timestamp Meme - 2,365 (combined)
Shiver with Anticipation [CW RPF; Jared/Jensen] salt_burn_porn; Timestamp to Oh, My Queen! - 3,900
Desire of Fault Lines [Supernatural; Sam/Dean] Timestamp to All Fired Up, This Soul for my Timestamp Meme - 1,107
4 CWRPF timestamps for my Timestamp Meme - 2,764 (combined)
2 timestamps to Sparks are Whirling Faster for my Timestamp Meme - 2,733 (combined)
Minotaurs Inside a Maze [Supernatural; Sam/Dean] - 9,763
Go On and Eat Stone [Supernatural] Remix of roque_clasique's Eat Stone and Go On for kamikazeremix - 3,028
Kicks Like a Sleep Twitch [Supernatural; Sam/Dean a> samdean_otp Minibang - 28,086
Oh, My Queen! [CW RPF; Jared/Jensen] rpf_big_bang - 32,000
Dream a Little Dream of Menagerie [CW RPF; Jared/Jensen] spn_reversebang - 16,139
Silence Will Fall (Paper on Doctor Who) – 5,370
The Crumbling Difference (Between Wrong and Right) [Supernatural; Sam/Dean/Castiel] wincestielbang - 12,523 (written this year; 16,518 total)
Up in the Air [CW RPF; Adrianne/Genevieve] spn_j2_xmas - 10,011
Unpublished But Written in 2012:
Living on Flood Tides [Supernatural; Sam/Dean] - 10,242
Carve Our Names in Hearts Into the Warhead [CW RPF; Jared/Jensen] - 398 (written this year; 541 total)
Outtakes [CW RPF; Jared/Jensen] - 1,390
Off to See the Wizard [Supernatural; Sam/Dean] gabriel_bigbang - 117
Total Word Count: 294,890
Fandoms that I dabbled in this year, old and new: I only wrote in Supernatural and CW RPF. But I was also fannishly (and academically) invested in Lord of the Rings/The Hobbit, Doctor Who, and Game of Thrones.
My favorite story this year: Oh, My Queen!, definitely. That story is my proudest fic accomplishment, and I'm sorry, but I fucking love it like nothing else.
My least favorite story this year: Rattling Your Locks. I don't think it's bad, though it was certainly rushed toward the end and suffered greatly for it. But the response it got has basically killed the whole story for me, and frankly I wish I'd never written it.
Most successful story: Rattling Your Locks. Soooo many comments about how unsatisfying the end is and how it needs a sequel. -___-
Story most underappreciated by the universe, in my opinion: Hmm. On the whole, I usually feel my stories get just as much attention as they deserve. It's almost always the stories I know aren't that good when I post or that I don't spend much time on that get the fewest comments, so I rarely feel anything is underappreciated. I guess I will say that I wrote two Wincest fics, Kicks Like a Sleep Twitch and Minotaurs Inside a Maze, that I thought were really pretty good and didn't get very many comments, but I know Wincest is not getting many readers lately in general, so I've decided not to take it personally. :P
Most fun story: Probably Dream a Little Dream of Menagerie. I think the answer to this question is something I worked on with ordinaryink for like three years in a row now. XD TRACEY IS THE ONLY FUN THING THAT HAPPENS IN MY LIFE. Or maybe Here Be Dragons. I was very LOLOLOLOL the whole time I was working on it. :DDDD
Story with single sexiest moment: Oh, My Queen! in large part because I am weird and generally the more emotional I feel about characters, the more invested I get in the porn. I was so into these characters and the sex scene, aside from being really hot and full of great new kinks I hadn't written before, was really emotionally driven, so I really feel it.
Biggest story fail: Ugh, so many fails of such epic proportions this year. Where to begin? I guess the polybigbang I failed to finish is the most disappointing one, because I really love that challenge. Of the stories I posted, the rush job I did on Rattling Your Locks is the biggest fail, mostly because it was my spn_j2_bigbang, so it was like dropping the ball while everyone was watching.
Hardest story to make: Haha, is answering this with my thesis cheating? Go On and Eat Stone was really rough because I guess I am not very good at remixing other people's fics. I lost steam on The Crumbling Difference (Between Wrong and Right) years ago and also found Castiel POV nearly impossible to sustain, so pushing through that was not fucking easy. And Oh, My Queen! was super draining, both physically and emotionally, not to mention how much I pushed myself on it, but that was hard in the best way possible.
Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you'd predicted? So much less. Like, this is my worst year for writing since I got into Supernatural fandom. I did, however, write a 50-page honors thesis in the spring, graduate, move, work fulltime at multiple jobs, date someone for the first time, and begin grad school, so it's not like I was sitting around scratching my balls.
What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted in January? I never in a million years would have thought I would be brave enough to write a story about a transgender character, but there Oh, My Queen! is.
Did you take any writing risks this year? What did you learn from them? I think I took a risk with Oh, My Queen! and Rattling Your Locks. What I learned, I suppose, is that taking a risk with fic is a 50/50 gamble and it could either end up being the thing you're most proud of or the baby you wish you'd dropped in a dumpster. I'm gonna keep on taking them, though, because nothing beats the feeling of a fic when you know you've written something you challenged yourself on and feel confident it paid off.
Most "Holy crap, that's wrong, even for you" story: I don't really feel like anything I did this year was that weird? Or at least, not weird enough that it's surprising for me to have done. Maybe Here Be Dragons? Not that I've *ever* been subtle about my feelings for tentacle porn, but other people might find it weird? Maybe The Crumbling Difference (Between Wrong and Right) because Castiel does not belong in porn, or at least not porn written by me because I am fucking terrible at writing him.
Story that shifted my own perceptions of the characters: I know this is going to be shocking, since I haven't licked my own butt over the story enough yet, but Oh, My Queen!. This Jared was obviously a very particular character and not applicable to most other stories, but writing this Jensen really did help me center my characterization of him.
Biggest Surprise: This is funny. Last year I answered this by saying I never expected to get above 200 watchers on my writing community—this year I was equally shocked to see my watchers for over 300! :D
Top 5 Scenes from Anywhere You Would Choose to Have Illustrated:
1. clex_monkie89, I STILL WANT TO SEE JAY WALKING THE DOGS. HEYHEY CLEX HEY. JAY NEEDS AN OSCARS DRESS. :DDDDDD
2. Stewardess!Adrianne/sexy-elf!Genevieve from Up in the Air. Basically because of objectification reasons.
3. Hehe, well. I got art for most of my fics this year, including Here Be Dragons, but I would really like to see Dean playing with Sam's tentacles because I am a child.
4. Anything at all from Minotaurs Inside a Maze.
5. I would like to see a scene from Always the Groomsman, Never the Groom illustrated.
The things I've learned this year: I'm really disappointed by how little I wrote, but at the same time, I know that this is part of being a real adult: fandom is going to have to take a hit, and I need to learn to accept that. Even when I do have a break, some nights I'm going to be too burnt out to write, and that's okay, you know?
Fic-writing goals for 2013: I would like to at least break 300,000 words in 2013. My real goal, however, is just to finish off the 8 stories I have started now—especially the 5 fics that I started in 2011 that have been neglected for an entire year or longer.